When a trauma hits our life, it’s natural to ask why this had to happen. But there comes a time when sitting around asking “Why?” is no longer beneficial or healing. So the next question to focus on is “What?”, as in, “What am I going to do now? “What information do I need in order to move forward? What do I have and how can I use that to help me get through this??
Focus on survival. In my b0ok From Cornered To Corner Office, I write about taking care of yourself: improving your career, making good things great. In the book, I outline a dire and distressing situation faced by Melody, who was completely blindsided by a divorce. For her, the first issue was survival. When you’re just trying to survive, you work your way through the maze one small step at a time. “How am I going to get dinner on the table for the kids tonight? Where can I stay until I find my own place? Who can recommend a good attorney?” Think of psychologist Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, the theory of motivation which states that a human’s biological and safety needs (such as food, water and shelter) must first be met before you can address needs of love, esteem and belonging.
Open yourself up to discovery. After you’ve weathered the survival period and you’re back on some kind of solid ground, it’s time to start casting the career net. It can feel uneasy to go from the hunker-down mode of survival to the optimism of self-discovery, but it’s a necessary step toward building your dream career from here on out. Think about options you’ve never considered before – selling the house, moving to another state – always backing up those ideas with fact-finding. When your foundation has crumbled and you’re starting from scratch, you can actually rebuild in an infinite number of ways. What’s your purpose now? What is it you really want?
For more insight into this topic, check out From Cornered To Corner Office.