First things first – what is “Emotional Intelligence?”
Writer Matthew Jones has covered this topic a lot over at Inc., and I want to raise your awareness about this topic that definitely impacts your current and future professional opportunities. In general, emotional intelligence is defined as “the capacity to be aware of, control, and express one’s emotions, and to handle interpersonal relationships judiciously and empathetically.”
As you read that definition, I’m sure you immediately thought of a coworker who IS – or more likely who IS NOT – emotionally intelligent.
But how do you know if YOU are emotionally intelligent? As Jones writes, one of the main keys to being emotionally intelligent is being self aware – and if you’re not self aware, you inherently have an uphill battle in becoming emotionally intelligent!
So Jones created a list of 10 actions that represent what an emotionally intelligent person would NOT do. It’s a really interesting list that provides relevant, familiar scenarios that we all have experienced – the question is whether or not you are the one acting inappropriately, or if you’re the one taking notice.
Here’s a sneak peek at Jones’ list – I hope you’ll read the entire article for smart insight into being an emotionally intelligent being. But for now, here’s what NOT TO DO!
1. Stand in the middle of an escalator with your suitcase while not thinking about the people behind you.
2. Be a leader and think that your words are more important than your behaviors.
3. Get angry at others in traffic without recognizing that your driving also inevitably irritates other drivers too.
4. Hate people who look, think, and act differently than you, then get frustrated when you get treated poorly for no apparent reason.
5. Preserve your spot in the checkout line with your full cart and not offering the individual with one item the opportunity to go ahead of you.
6. Chew gum and food loudly, or blast music out of your cell phone, without being aware of your surroundings.
7. Taking up excessive physical space on public transit when you’re a person of privilege–like a straight white male.
8. Speak at length about yourself without asking other people questions about themselves, and then getting upset that your relationships are strained.
9. Walk up or down the stairs in the middle rather than allowing the people behind you room to pass.
10. Be a manager and not realizing how much lack of praise impacts the team.
Do any of these sound familiar? Hopefully not TOO much! Read the entire article for more insight into how you can enhance your emotional intelligence.